If Only There Was Background Music...

First, I must give credit where credit is due. I DID NOT come up with this on my own. I got this idea from a guy named John Acuff and he has THE funniest blog I have EVER read!!! You can read it at www.stufffchrisitianslike.blogspot.com. Some Christians get very offended at his humor, but if you like sarcasm, this is the place for you! The guy is a Christian and he makes fun of the funny things Christians do. LOVE IT!

Anyway, he references the music played during prayer and "serious times" and then came up with this idea that we should be able to have some sort of hand-held device that plays background music for things that go on during our day. I thought to myself, "Hey! Since my life is like a sitcom, what a great idea!"

So, what kind of music would there be for me?

Let's see...

First, I must warn you that I listen to mostly Christian music and I don't watch TV. Don't even have cable. Thus, I am very pop culture deficient. If I linked songs that have questionable lyrics, please know that all I know of the song is what I heard in the 30 second clip from iTunes. And if I chose a song that is done by an artist who is known for his/her questionable lyrics, I most likely have no idea who they are. I did stay away from DJ Nasty, however. Something just told me not to go there.

So without further ado, let's start with the drive-through car wash. There would be this beat...something you'd hear in low rider. Then as I enter the car wash, the music breaks into,

(click on lyrics to hear song.)
At the car wash!
Talkin' 'bout the car wash, yeah.
Car wash! Car wash, yeah!"

Since there were kids in the car with me, I chose the Shark Tale version.

I'm hearing, "Don't Worry, Be Happy" as I'm driving home with my fully repaired Expedition...until I hit the garbage cans and that's when I hear...

"Wipe Out!"

How about the fire alarm? Oh, I think this one would be perfect! Can't you just hear the dark cloud of doom hovering over the campus as everyone rushes out to the parking lot? Can't you just feel the intense stress and embarrassment when you listen to this song?

And what about when my son was born in the ambulance? I'm picturing Josh driving me down the road at 80mph hour, quiet as a mouse, when all of the sudden I say, "Call 911!" and then all you can hear is "Gunlinger" while Josh makes contact with the dispatcher.

Once She-Paramedic enters the room and tells me, "Oh, Honey. You're not having this baby now," the ghost of Aretha Franklin would come from nowhere, look She-dispatcher right in the eye and sing...

R-E-S-P-E-C-T, I got what it means to me!

Then, while She-Paramedic and Wet-Paramedic wheel me out, Aretha fades back into the wall and Peter & Gordan stand side-by-side at the door of the ambulance and sing...

"Lady Godiva"... since that's kind of how one might feel being exposed from the waist down! (Was that over the top?)

Now for the bleach story, I think that perhaps this might be in order:

"Get My Drink On"

Or how about when my purse went flying into the air after falling off the top of my car? "Fly"

Finally, I think that whenever I get behind the wheel, "Livin' on a Prayer" should be playing!

These are just some ideas I have. Feel free to leave a comment and post your own! I have yet to come up with one for the fuel pump.