What? Where am I? I don't recognize this place. Could it be...? OH! It's my blog! It's been so long I forgot what it looked like!
October is always incredibly busy for our family. I intentionally try not to schedule things in October because I know that every October is busy. The calendar starts out with only a couple birthday plans scribbled in and evolves into something that resembles my daughter's bedroom...stuff everywhere!
It was one incredibly fun month! We hosted lots of people in our home, including one weekend of some of our closest friends. As one of them (James) was getting ready to head out, he said to me,
"Rachael, if I didn't know you and had just met you 5 minutes ago, I would know that you are really into worship."
...which got me to thinking about this quiz I took about what you should be blogging about. "My Poor Husband" is not about worship and since the title, "My Poor Husband," seems like an odd title for a worship blog, I'm not intending for this blog to transform into a worship blog. This post will just be for fun. Besides, there are too many worship blogs out there for me to start a new one!
The quiz asks, "What can you not NOT talk about?"
The funny thing about James' comment is that I continually hold back from talking about it, most notably the music portion of worship. The subject tends to halt a naturally flowing conversation and it doesn't take long before people are looking for something to do instead of looking at me while they pretend to listen. Shoot, sometimes they don't even pretend and start talking to someone else or interrupt and completely change the subject! I guess that qualifies as something I cannot NOT talk about!
Music moves me. So deeply, in fact, that I am very careful about what I listen to. Every part of me is involved in the process of listening to music. My ears...obviously, but also my body as it instictively moves to the beat. (Actually, moving to the rhythm is a lot more fun!) My mind is thinking about the chords and how certain notes make that certain part of that song so...so...gosh, I don't know. That feeling you get so deep down inside your soul that you wish you could grab and hold onto it so tightly, yet you're afraid to let it out because you're not sure what might happen if you could actually look it in the face. It might make you cry without an end in sight. It might make you levitate as you dance across the room. It might make you so angry that you fear the wrath inside of you. Or it may physically knock you to the ground, searching for just a single word that you can offer to God to explain why it is you worship Him.
Yeah. THAT part of the song.
My mind is also pondering the words to the song and wondering what the author's meaning is behind the words.
And my heart is experiencing such a range of emotions. In one song I can feel energized, intrigued, sad, sappy, and dark. There is a happiness in even the darkest songs simply because I am feeling.
That's what music does to me.
Worship. That goes deeper.
...to be continued. That's probably enough to digest for one night.